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Monday, May 1, 2006

  Monday Morning Mirth  

OK. That’s enough.
Are you sick of being held hostage by
clueless Hollywood Casting Directors?

Over tea and biscuits in the neighborhood, Theresa and I decided that the casting of one Robert Langdon in the Da Vinci Code* had pushed us over the edge. WHY would we believe that Tom Hanks would inspire the kind of lust that would cause a MUCH YOUNGER any actress to throw caution to the foul medieval winds and be swept away by his magnetic ministrations.

AAAK. Now it’s your turn to change history.

Cast Robert Langdon
Viggo Mortenson (47)
George Clooney (45)
Denzel Washington (52)
Matthew McConaughey (36)
Kenneth Branagh (46)
Alan Rickman (60)
Tom Hanks (50)
Free polls from

* how many times have you read it?

** write-in casting gleefully accepted below :P

41 responses to “Monday, May 1, 2006”

  1. Toby Wollin says:

    Yep – the whole Tom Hanks thing is really a “wtf” sort of choice. Now, Alan Rickman, to me, has just enough of the “you have no idea what the hell he’d do” to keep you on edge. On the other hand, in the hands of his usual directors, he does have the tendency to chew the scenery a little, which is sort of distracting. But he’s like “the little girl who had a little curl” – when he’s good, he’s very, very good…

  2. Heather says:

    I always wished that Michael vartan (37) would have caught someone’s eye. Honestly, if I were Sophie and I saw what Robert langdon looked like (Sorry Tom) I’d probably run and let the French polic have him.

    There’s always Hugh Laurie too!

  3. Karen says:

    My husband and I discussed this when they first mentioned making the movie. Our personal favorite would have been Harrison Ford. He’s cool enough for the action parts and attractive enough for a love interest.

  4. Cara says:

    Never read it, but Rickman is super sexy in an Rochester (Jane Eyre) sort of way and I think Viggo would have been a good pick from that list.

    Anyone but Hanks with the bloat and the dumb hair.

  5. Debi says:

    I only read it once. I think Hanks is an ok choice but whats with the serial killer hair?? YIKES! From your list I’m torn between Clooney, Denzel and Rickman has potential. I think Nicolas Cage would be another good choice…passionate, obsessive and pretty cute when he’s got his “weave” on :)

  6. Christine says:

    David Duchovny as Langdon all day, every day!!

  7. Bonne Marie says:

    I couldn’t find a picture of the BLOAT (gasping for air) but I found this:

  8. rachelkates says:

    We need more movies with Vigo!

  9. Leah says:

    Ah! Rickman would be my first choice, though Clooney pulls in with a close second!

    Poor Tom! He can act, but he just doesn’t have that sex appeal!

  10. Leah says:

    Oh, and I’ve read the book twice!

    And what about Keanu? Or Brendan Fraser? They are just so pretty!!

  11. Erin says:

    I haven’t read the book, but if Adrian Brody could do an American accent, wouldn’t he look gorgeous matched with Audrey Tatou?

  12. Sarah says:

    I’m liking the David Duchovny suggestion. However, he was portrayed as a plain professory type in the book, which I read 2x. I think all of Dan Brown’s character totally unbelievably get the girls they never should have gotten. Issues.

  13. genia says:

    David Duchovny was my choice as well. I’ve read or listened to DaVinci Code and Angels & Demons a few times now and Tom Hanks just isn’t Robert Langdon (hair or no hair!)

    Kevin Costner would all make a great Robert (IMHO). He would be able to convencing as a confirmed bachelor professor!

  14. Tracy says:

    I have no idea what the actor’s name is offhand, but I vote for the guy that plays Dr. House on Fox Network. Love the eyes – and the Brit accent when he’s not in character.

    Speaking of Brits, the guy that plays Dr. Baltar on the new Battlestar: Galactica could pull it off too, and he already has the hair.

  15. DH and I were thinking along the lines of Liam Neeson or and I’m blanking on his name because we often confuse him with Liam Neeson…

    But, we were definitely NOT thinking Tom Hanks, that is positive!

  16. deb says:

    Just wondering why Alan Rickman is on the list and doing so well…hmmmm, what on earth am I missing? I just don’t get it… thinks some more…

  17. pixie says:

    Ya know who woulda been wonderful?? They guy who played Mr Darcey in the latest Pride % Prejudice, omg that man was hot.

    But really George Clooney would have been best as he is older but still hot. I like Tom Hanks, but not for this, I hope it is okay. It’s a damn good book, hard to fark it up, it’s not like it has a bunch of s3x scenes anyways hehe.

  18. Gina says:

    Even a now-older Harrison Ford would have been a better choice.

  19. Beth S. says:

    I was more perplexed about Amelie than Forrest Gump. Maybe it’s my memory that’s at fault, but wasn’t Sophie supposed to be a curly blond? Yet the film posters show Audrey Tautou’s undisguised short, dark hair. (I do remember that the character wears an Aran sweater; let’s see if that bit makes it into the film.)

  20. Paula says:

    Alan Rickman??? I love him in Harry Potter, but I have to poke out my mind’s eye when I think of him as a love interest/action hero.

    The actor has to be old enough to not be too cute but sexy, and young enough to look believable in what is really one of the worst books since Robert James Waller put pen to paper. Someone with a soap opera background. Hmmm…. how about Michael Baldwin from the Young and the Restless? Forgot his real name, but he’s good at being anything from a sociopath to a love interest, he’s attractive and sexy but not too cute, and he’s got great bedroom eyes.

    Viggo is also good, because he is SO HOT, but also not very bright, so he’d be extremely believable.

  21. Agnes says:

    Completely agree with your opinion of Tom Hanks. I just read the book once but I swear I had Johnny Depp in mind when I read!

  22. Seanna Lea says:

    I feel silly. I haven’tread the book, but from what I heard I just didn’t think of Tom Hanks. But not knowing if the character was supposed to be older-hot or younger-hot, I chose younger-hot.

    I could watch Johnny Depp in anything. I just rewatched Don Juan de Marco, which seems like practice for Pirates of the Caribbean.

  23. Nik says:

    when i first heard the news that Tom had been cast as Langdon I screamed. Literally. I can’t see it. I think I’d vote for Viggo just because that hunk ‘o man makes my loins tingle.

  24. Nik says:

    when i first heard the news that Tom had been cast as Langdon I screamed. Literally. I can’t see it. I think I’d vote for Viggo just because that hunk ‘o man makes my loins tingle.

  25. Carrie says:

    I, too, screamed when I heard that Tom Hanks was cast in the lead role. Love him to death, but Langdon’s role strikes me as requiring someone younger and much hotter than Hanks. According to a few of the movie sites, Bill Paxton was originally approached for the role but had to decline due to his obligations to HBO’s Big Love. Personally, I think he would have made an excellent Langdon in a “typical Yank” sort of way. I also think that Sir Leigh Teabing was miscast. But, then, I am all about Jean Reno and he is going to be divine as Bezu Fache … Simply divine.

  26. Karrie Dunning says:

    Each time I’ve read it, Langdon = Giles
    Tony Head’s got it all; tweedy, smart, sexy, action hero (seen him weild a sword?)

    Yep, he’s the guy.

  27. Emmy says:

    Viggo is my vote — but also: Costner (great athletic bod, naughty smile a la Bull Durham); Heath Ledger (that man is one hunk of gorgeous); Sean Connery (hey, I still love him); Timothy Dalton (he was the sexiest Mr. Rochester ever); Ralph Fiennes (End of the Affair type).

    This is fun!

  28. lisa says:

    I’m against Branagh because he’s been in all the films I’ve had to watch for Lit class. He can’t be both Hamlet AND Frankenstein.

    I was thinking Edward Norton Jr. would be a good choice. Or Christopher Eccleston.(But, then again, I am hooked on his Dr. Who.)

  29. Jennifer says:

    Mmmmm… Viggo…

  30. Mary Neal says:

    Oh! I’m with Karrie. Tony Head all the way. (Although that VF pic of Viggo was … um, well you know. Catching my breath here.)

    BTW, if you don’t get Alan Rickman, see Truly, Madly, Deeply. JUST adorable! But I don’t think he’s Langdon.

    Hanks is the supernice guy. Love him, but he is NOT sexy.

  31. Mary Neal says:

    One more thing. I find Matthew McConaughey absolutely revolting.

  32. Terry says:

    Isn’t Ron Howard the director? I think that is why Hanks got it. I just don’t see it. And what IS with that hair?

  33. Becky says:

    I read the book once and while it was a page turner, I absolutely did NOT read the Robert Langdon role as sexy in any way whatsoever. In fact, he greatly irritated me. So maybe the miscasting of Hanks will end up being a perfect choice.

  34. Delica says:

    Tom Hanks – no, no, no BUT I agree from reading the book I didn’t really think of Robert Langdon being sexy. For a smart, masculine yet vulnerable type, I go with David Duchovny. For yum appeal – Colin Firth! That scene in Pride & Prejudice when he goes swimming in the pond and Elizabeth runs into him . . . romantic *sigh*!

  35. Norah says:

    I voted for Viggo, but I think Colin Firth would be great too.

  36. Nancy in A2 says:

    How about the Man-Who-Will-Not-Make Movies, Daniel Day-Lewis? Ciaran Hinds could be pretty damn cool, too.

  37. Gayle says:

    When I read the book I remember thinking that I could see Russell Crowe in this role.

  38. Debbi says:

    Okay, wasn’t Langdon supposed to be smart? Like librarian pedantic kind of smart since he knows all this bookish/historical and how to preserve it all type stuff? Most of the guys mentioned couldn’t touch that and wouldn’t know how to try (it’s not real “in” in the Hollywood from what I’ve seen on the screens lately). So hmmm… Smart guy, not super sexy but pulls through when the action hero personality is needed and is man enough to inspire lust and he’s got to be 40’ish to have made it through college+ and be into his “I’m a rockstar in the world of art and history because I know it ALL” career – sort of a tough role to fill. I’m liking Mr. Hanks for this. Sorry ladies. Much as I love to drool over the likes of Matthew who gives me shivers he’s so pretty (I just want to touch him a little, honest), I’m not seeing them doing this role. But that’s me. I’d like to know the real story of Mary Magdalene – maybe email me if no one else wants to know?

  39. Norah says:

    I know it’s too late and we already voted, but what about Gary Sinise?

  40. Emmy says:

    Someone told me Hanks bought the rights to the film from the author — so that’s why he was cast. He owns it.

  41. Ann says:

    Hmmm. I vote Colin Firth, even though he’s not on the list…He can do that ‘Hey, I look perplexed but I’m really very canny’ thing beautifully. And hot? I’d watch that guy sit and drink a cup of coffee… for several hours. And Tom Hanks doesn’t just kill me…I like him and all, and for me hotness is directly proportional to talentedness, so…

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